Category Archives: Help

5 Keys to Safe Uncluttered Living Areas

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5 keys to safe uncluttered living areas

Simple solutions to safe, uncluttered living areas.

Needs change as you care for a loved one; whether in their home or yours. It can be overwhelming to maintain a safe, uncluttered environment. Here are five simple ways to make living areas more enjoyable for everyone in the household.

Actions depend on several factors:
Is the person you are caring for confined to a room or the entire home? What about their mobility; move on their own? With a walker? Wheelchair?

Critical easy to-do list for every family. For this article we will assume an elderly person is able to move around on his/her own with some assistance from walker or chair.

#1 FLOORS: Are they easy to navigate or are they slippery or rough? Did you remove any area (aptly called throw) rugs. Do they have appropriate footwear, not slippery soles, etc.?

#2 FURNITURE: Are there small tables, plants or other items that would be easily tipped over or tripped on when one is going to the bathroom or kitchen? What about shelving units near the traffic area? Are they top heavy? Securely in place?

#3 LAMPS & ELECTRONICS: Are lamps easy to reach and turn on and off? Is the phone in reach, if applicable? Can they turn on the radio or television? Is the traffic area clear of cords?

#4 PERSONAL NEEDS: Is there a small tray or table for books and personal needs within reach? Does your loved one have access to water or have a pitcher and water cup handy? Is a box of tissue or some paper towels?

#5 MIRRORS: Do they enjoy seeing themselves in the mirror? Or does their reflection in the mirror bother them? (My mother enjoyed the mirrors, others may be frightened by the images they see or the movement as they pass by.)

Caring for others is a lifetime learning experience. Small things that we never even consider can be overwhelming to someone who is ill or elderly.

Another note on keeping others comfortable as you care for them: sit a spell in their chair. Seriously. One day I sat in Mother’s chair to rest a bit from cleaning. I was shocked to realize how uncomfortable it was. It looked just fine but the cushions were worn and back support was nil. A new chair was ordered right away. Take time to sit where they sit; look at what they see everyday. How can you improve their environment?

Have a great week; let me hear from you soon.

Hugs,

Have you checked out my articles in the Springfield Writer’s Guild Anthology yet? You’ll enjoy Creative Collections.

6 Keys to Easing Strained Relationships

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6 Keys to Easing Strained RelationshipsTreasure what you have now; be ready for change.

My husband was my greatest encourager during the years we were caring for Mother. He was always ready to help me physically, emotionally, and spiritually. He carefully guided me through each decision but let me make the final call.

We had spoiled each other—we enjoyed talking, playing, and working together. At first Mother’s care was minimal and my husband and I continued our daily routines. I never realized how our relationship suffered as I gradually spent more time and energy on her needs and less on his. Although this shift was inevitable, I learned some simple tips that made the changes easier. Perhaps these tips will help you in your situation.

Become aware of your specific needs; then act.

#1. Take time to ask your family or friends how the current situation affects them. Do they feel slighted? Are there needs they have you can still provide? Do they feel left out?

#2. Realize you cannot go back to the way it was; life does not stay the same for anyone. The commitment to care for someone means your life and those around you will change.

Grow better or bitter, the choice is ultimately yours.

My husband is precious, but he does not prepare meals, do laundry, or make the beds. That wasn’t an issue with the two of us; or with the children home. After Mom came, I did, however, catch myself envying those whose husbands could help in that way. Note: the Lord has a way of reminding us what really matters, and it’s not that sink of dirty dishes!

#3. Refuse to dwell on what you cannot change. Live in the present and make the most of it. Be open to new ideas, new ways of doing things. If you are set in your ways like I am, this can be a difficult step, but well worth the journey. I remind myself daily, it is people and not things that are important.

#4. Develop a new plan. What is it that you can do to encourage those around you? Does it seem you are pushing them away because of your busy-ness? Can you change your schedule to accommodate some of their needs as well?

#5. Accept help when offered, even when you know the task will not be done “right”. This was difficult for me. I learned it was okay if the towels were folded incorrectly or dishes and groceries were put in the wrong places.

#6. Find a smile and see it reflected time and again on those around you. I am always amazed at the difference a simple smile makes. Try it on yourself—right now. Face a mirror with your eyes closed, smile real big and look at yourself. (Did you chuckle?)

There will always be changes in our lives. Parents, kids, grandkids, other family and friends move in and out of our lives seeking love and nurturing. With God’s help we can learn to look up instead of down and enjoy the journey.

Hugs,

(Information for this article was taken from my book, MY MOTHER MY CHILD.)

Caregiving Help Managing Time and Tasks

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09 babyStart by doing what is necessary; then do what’s possible; and suddenly you’re doing the impossible. ~ St. Francis of Assisi

It is a fact, you cannot do it all.

It is true, caring for family is a full-time job; you will never be completely caught up. Let me ask you: If you have a list of things to do today; which will you do first? I can tell you, you will do the easier task first—the task that appeals to you most. That will leave the more difficult, time-consuming tasks until last.

You must be prepared for inevitable interruptions.

On a day when I was facing more work than I could get done, the telephone rang. (At least this time it wasn’t a telemarketer!)

“It’s a beautiful day, how about going to town with me for some coffee? We’ll not be gone long and you need a break. You work so hard.”

“I’d love to but I need to catch up a few things; perhaps another time.” As I hung up the phone, I was angry with myself that I could not make time for coffee with a friend.

As I wilted into the chair for my private pity-party, the choice became clear, I could sit and moan and groan or I could take action. I chose the latter.

Armed with a pad, pen, and determination, I listed my tasks. First I listed all the things that absolutely were necessary to get done today. Then I listed those things that could be done in steps—bite-sized chunks instead of the entire project at once. Lastly, I listed those things that someone else could do for me (if they would) or things that could be left undone.

Here are some helpful hints from my planning time:

  • 1 Accept the truth in the statement: A woman’s work is never done; you never catch up!
  • 2 Develop a simple plan that will work for you and stick to it.
  • 3 Instead of going to the store, consider adjusting the menu and using what’s on hand.
  • 4 Shake the habit of piddling with papers; if you can’t tend to them immediately, put them in a basket to work through later (maybe while you are watching television.)
  • 5 Choose only one or two books to leave out; put the rest away until those are finished.
  • 6 Take time to reward yourself for a day well spent.

I was now on a mission.

In record time I made a casserole for dinner using items in the pantry and freezer instead of going to the store. While the casserole baked, I quickly chopped up a salad and washed what dishes I had used. Then I cleaned the kitchen and finished what was necessary in the bedroom and bathrooms and swept the front porch.

I saw that I had time now to clear off the books and “stuff” that had made a home on the dining table. Here is where I often get bogged down; I read every piece of paper on the table and browse the inviting books. Today my priority was to accomplish my goal and clear the table.

I discovered much of my concern was projects that I would not get done anyway; there will always be something left undone. On my third list dusting the blades on the ceiling fans, some mending, and washing the quilts could wait until a more opportune time.  I could add mending to tomorrow’s list and make sure to include it in my schedule.

Wow! It’s still early in the afternoon and I am through with today’s chores. Where is my telephone?

“Cindy, are you still game for a get-together? Why don’t you come over and we’ll have coffee and cookies on the deck and enjoy this beautiful day? See you soon.”

“To everything there is a season, and a time for everything under the sun … “Ecclesiastes

Hugs,

Have you read MY MOTHER MY CHILD? If so, please follow this link and leave a comment. Thanks so much. Be sure to share copies with your friends and family.